| Why hello there, friend! Reading through posts and topics is nice and all, but I'm sure you would probably enjoy the experience much more if you could actually respond to them. If you don't already have an account feel free to register one using this link! It takes ten seconds at most to fill in the required information. Sign up now, and get a $9.95 discount! WE'RE SO EXCITED! Note 1: If you recently requested a name-change, you need to log-in with your new name. Note 2: The discount thing is a joke. Accounts are free, obviously.  Sign up now, and get rid of screen-hogs Buddy and Budgee! |
| *plants flag* | |
|---|---|
| Topic Started: Apr 1 2009, 10:11 PM (208 Views) | |
| Ectopants | Apr 1 2009, 10:11 PM Post #1 |
Freelance Gangster
|
Now let's all play naked twister. |
 |
 
|
| Wakapanda Of Doom | Apr 2 2009, 12:53 AM Post #2 |
ONE OF THE ORIGINAL FUCKS
|
so who can enter this place? |
|
|
|
| Banned yet Again | Apr 2 2009, 01:21 AM Post #3 |
Time Travelling Swordsman
|
uhhhh wut? |
|
|
| Ectopants | Apr 2 2009, 01:51 AM Post #4 |
|
Freelance Gangster
|
IBZersch |
|
|
|
| Sorin Markov | Apr 2 2009, 01:51 AM Post #5 |
Imprisoner of the Eldrazi
|
drop it off drop it off bitch i got a sawed off put dat money in the bag, ho i'll blow dat off |
|
|
|
| Sorin Markov | Apr 2 2009, 01:52 AM Post #6 |
|
Imprisoner of the Eldrazi
|
It all started out cool and calm, we had it under control. We had blueprints to the bank from roof to floor. My nigga Paul had them yawks and bullet-proof vests. Juicy dropped off the 600 the get away the best. We had an in-sider that was working for Union Planners. She told us everyday at 6 o clock they turn off the cameras At 6 o five the guards go on break for milk and bananas. Six thirty guards come back from break and back on with the cameras. So that gives us twenty five minutes to get in and out. We gotta do this shit so quick and slick without a doubt. I got some folks that be down to ride all it takes a shout, And if its business they coming quicker that's what they bout. God as my witness we gonna get this one some way some how. With thirty million dollars in diamonds we cant miss out. The plans in action tomorrow we gonna case it out. Give me twenty four more hours and we gonna clean it out
Edited by Sorin Markov, Apr 2 2009, 01:53 AM.
|
|
|
|
| Ectopants | Apr 2 2009, 01:54 AM Post #7 |
|
Freelance Gangster
|
Zersch can you please recall a story (or the story if there is only one) regarding the drug dealer under the moniker of Cuff? I was looking for it in the old old old posts a while back but I think it's lost in a sea of several year's worth of topics. |
|
|
|
| Sorin Markov | Apr 2 2009, 02:22 AM Post #8 |
|
Imprisoner of the Eldrazi
|
I can't point you to where the post is, but I definitely remember the story. It's one of my friend and I's favorite stories, we joke all the time about it. When one us talks about needing to whip someones ass or something we always tac on "gotta grab dat nigga cuff first." Did you want me to give you the story again or were you just asking if I remembered it? If it's the former: It was my friend Allen's first apartment, and we all treated it like a flophouse, just hanging out their to get our underage drink on and do every drug underneath the sun. It was a nice place at first, but as time went on people we didn't even like would show up, then people we didn't even know would show up, and then there was Cuff. I was back in one of the back bedrooms probably smoking weed, but it could've also been the night we all tried Special K for the first time, but that's not important. I could hear everyone in the living room having a good ol' time and all of a sudden there was a loud knock at the door and Allen yelled at whoever it was to come in. Well it was one of the 'people we didn't like' that showed up, Jonny Mac, and with him was the biggest, blackest nigger I had ever seen in my life accompanied by what I to this day refer to as his hetero life mate, littler Cuff who was wearing a faux leather jacket and did nothing but back up whatever Cuff said. Anyway, Cuff was darker than Mark Henry and his dreadlocks were more matted than The Predator. Everyone in the living room is silent now, and I can see out through the door what just walked into the apartment. I believe my best friend Jesse and his girlfriend were in the room with me, they were on the bed, and our mutual friend Steven was on Allen's PC in the bedroom. We hear Allen politely ask Cuff to take his shoes off, because even though it was a drug den we all had to remove our shoes. Cuff responds with "Why? Dis carpet made outta pussy hair? If it aint, den i aint takin shit off." And that was the end of that, Allen said yes sir and sat back down. Jonny Mac disappears on into the living room and passes into the kitchen where he is now out of sight from where I'm sitting. Big Cuff asks Allen where da smoke at and that rat son of a bitch points Cuff in our direction so all I see is this lumbering, black hill giant traipsing through the hallway to the open doorway with me staring at him the entire time he came through. He enters, with little Cuff in tow, and says "Was good niggas, who got dat good shit." He plops his big fat ass down on Allen's heavy duty safe and just kind of blobs out like Chris Farley on a binder. Jesse's girlfriend is fucking frightened at this point, and is in the fetal position next to him. I too was rather intimidated by this super massive black hole (*) that is now sitting pretty much directly across from me demanding that we smoke our good weed with him. And we did have some really good shit, but we didn't want to share with these guys. Oh, and lil Cuff is standing off to his left the entire time, leaned against the wall staring at everyone in the room in turn. Cuff keeps asking saying " Don't do a nigga like that, I just got outta jail the other day I need some good ass smoke " This threw up several more red flags and finally Steven, the guy at the PC, spoke up and said "We don't have any good shit left, all we got is this" and he pulled out his personal stash of some shitty Mexican brick weed and threw it on Cuff's lap. Then comes the most strangest thing of all. Cuff proceeds to pull out a, what appeared to be, hand carved Mr. Hanky bowl from his jacket pocket and packed every last bit of the weed into it and he and lil Cuff smoked every bit of it without even passing it back to us. When that was said and done, he reached into his other pocket and declared "You white boys need any hard?" We were like nah nah nah, we'll pass, but he still pulls out a tied off baggy with several scraggly looking crack rocks in them. He opens up the bag and showcases them to us. "You sure? You can buy some now, and buy some mo lata" As if that was going to convince any of us to buy crack from him. At this point I abandoned my best friend and my acquaintance and say I have to go to the bathroom, but really just go to the next bedroom over. It belonged to a guy that lived there named Kaleb, who wasn't home at the time so his bedroom was pitch black. I sat in Kaleb's bedroom in the darkness until I finally heard Cuff and lil Cuff migrating out of Allen's bedroom. I don't even dare return, I just stay in the dark. Finally I hear Jonny Mac yell out in his hick/gangsta hybrid voice that they was bout to hit the club so they all left and loaded up into his shitty baby blue Lebaron and got out of there. About the same time Kaleb arrived home and he came straight to his bedroom. He finds me sitting by the window, peering out of the blinds watching Cuff and lil Cuff's every move. When I heard Kaleb come in I turned to explain to him and he just laughs and says "You don't have to say a word, I saw why you are in here hiding. I would've been in here too." And we laughed our asses off before going back over to Allen's bedroom where we found something Cuff had forgotten: His Mr Hanky Bowl. We washed off the mouth piece because ... well hell, we had to smoke out of it just to say we had, and plus we owed Steven some of our good shit for sacrificing his dirt to shut the silver back up. Word is he eventually returned one day to get the Mr Hanky Bowl during the daylight hours when none of the usual party people were there, and it was just a straight edge guy that had moved in and was sleeping in the kitchen (yes, a mattress in the kitchen) had to deal with the terror by himself. That's everything as I remember it. The Cuff quotes may not be exact, but they're damn close. Edited by Sorin Markov, Apr 2 2009, 06:07 AM.
|
|
|
|
| Ectopants | Apr 2 2009, 02:31 AM Post #9 |
|
Freelance Gangster
|
Ahh thank you, that's way more in-depth than the first time around. The pussy hair comment is probably my favorite part. and LOL @ Lil Cuff. I wonder what the two Cuffs are up to now. |
|
|
|
| Sorin Markov | Apr 2 2009, 06:02 AM Post #10 |
|
Imprisoner of the Eldrazi
|
Actually, I went to my friend's right after I wrote that and posted it and I mentioned Cuff and asked if he had heard anything about him lately. He said that last time he heard from Jonny Mac that Cuff was... here, I'll give you ten lines to figure it out for yourself. In jail or prison. Lil Cuff is still a mystery. |
|
|
|
| Dick Gumshoe | Apr 2 2009, 09:22 AM Post #11 |
.gif)
Yes, we travel on Kangaroos.
|
Moi. 
|
|
|
|
| Mr Whiskey Dick | Apr 2 2009, 09:37 AM Post #12 |
Yes, I'm THAT guy!
|
i wasn't even elected... |
|
|
|
| Phoenix Wright | Apr 2 2009, 09:39 AM Post #13 |
OBJECTION!
|
Yes you were, you just didn't get any of the messages. |
|
|
|
| Dick Gumshoe | Apr 2 2009, 09:54 AM Post #14 |
|
Yes, we travel on Kangaroos.
|
Messages? |
|
|
|
| Phoenix Wright | Apr 2 2009, 09:57 AM Post #15 |
|
OBJECTION!
|
See pinned topic. Or 'Bring me Blood' on the general board. |
|
|
|
| Dick Gumshoe | Apr 2 2009, 10:01 AM Post #16 |
|
Yes, we travel on Kangaroos.
|
Oh. Well, I didn't get any messages. >_> |
|
|
|
| Phoenix Wright | Apr 2 2009, 10:03 AM Post #17 |
|
OBJECTION!
|
Too bad, your name was included in the script, so you did have a chance of seeing them. The luck of the draw, I guess. |
|
|
|
| Dick Gumshoe | Apr 2 2009, 10:06 AM Post #18 |
|
Yes, we travel on Kangaroos.
|
Awesomesauce. |
|
|
|
| MLWW | Apr 2 2009, 01:49 PM Post #19 |
Dutch Bastard
|
I got a message so all is not lost :D |
|
|
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
| « Previous Topic · The Sweat Factory · Next Topic » |
5:14 PM Mar 14
